Mondays
(via onlylolgifs)
Posted 2 months ago
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an unexpected heist | modern au
Thorin Oakenshield is the wretched heir to a fortune that was robbed from him and left him orphaned. With the help of a motley crew of aspiring robbers and not-burglars, he plans an elaborate heist to reclaim what is rightfully his, but little does he and the company know of the craftiness of the wily tyrant Smaug.
(note | not pictured here due to technical reasons: gloin, bifur and oin)
(Source: osgiliaths, via flatbear)
a guide to uk cities for foreign people
| manchester: | gays. you will probably get mugged. |
| liverpool: | like manchester, but less gay. you will definitely get mugged. |
| newcastle: | probably quite good for canadians as exists in permafrost and has never left the 90s. |
| leeds: | it's a lot cheaper than london |
| bradford: | leeds but awful |
| nottingham: | gun death capital of the uk! |
| derby: | intense rivalry with nottingham, literally no one else in the country or world gives any fucks about this. |
| hull: | violently resist anyone who attempts to take you here |
| leicester: | i'm not sure this is a real place |
| york: | this is an illustration from the top of a christmas biscuit assortment |
| birmingham: | NO. |
| brighton & hove: | more gays. is only a pretend city. mild to moderate chance of mugging. contains some deeply annoying hippies. basically if san francisco was british. |
| portsmouth: | there is literally nothing here. |
| southampton: | exactly the same as portsmouth but smells of off milk |
| bristol: | you have a 1 in 10 chance of ending up in a bbc recording. everyone sounds like a farmer or bob marley. |
| cardiff: | you have a 1 in 5 chance of ending up in a bbc recording, and a 1 in 3 chance of being glassed. |
| plymouth: | post apocalyptic wind tunnel full of drunk sailors pissing on depressed hookers. do not enter. |
| penzance: | everyone here is from london now. |
| london: | no one from london is actually from london and even breathing is expensive. |
| cambridge: | windy and full of equal amounts of homeless drug addicts and public schoolboys. the junkies are nicer. |
| oxford: | same number of cunts as cambridge but easier to escape from due to all-night bus to london |
| edinburgh: | a goth turned into a city. basically london but slightly more scottish. |
| glasgow: | it is impossible to tell whether people are angry or happy. |
| aberdeen: | las vegas at the point when vegas starts crying uncontrollably |
| belfast: | do not order "an irish car bomb" OR "a black and tan" here. |
| wolverhampton: | really, really don't. |
| norwich: | count people's fingers. mutations walk here. |
| coventry: | like plymouth, bombed flat in ww2. like plymouth, failed to take the hint. like plymouth: do not alight here. |
| peterborough: | you probably got off the train to Edinburgh a couple of hours too early. |
Posted 4 months ago
61,278 notes
This could save someone. Just by you reblogging it.
| Depression Hotline: | 1-630-482-9696 |
| Suicide Hotline: | 1-800-784-8433 |
| LifeLine: | 1-800-273-8255 |
| Trevor Project: | 1-866-488-7386 |
| Sexuality Support: | 1-800-246-7743 |
| Eating Disorders Hotline: | 1-847-831-3438 |
| Rape and Sexual Assault: | 1-800-656-4673 |
| Grief Support: | 1-650-321-5272 |
| Runaway: | 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000 |
| Exhale: | After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253 |
“A man unwilling to fight for what he wants, deserves what he gets.”
See, this is another example of why I’m fully in favour of guyliner.
(via lokiintheskywithdiamonds)
Posted 6 months ago
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